Illusions

Cathy Seipp at Cathy's World Blog has a post on lung cancer which asks the same question I do. Why is it that breast cancer and other illnesses get so much more funding than the major diseases that kill both men and women such as lung cancer and heart disease? Some people have said to me that lung cancer or heart disease is avoidable--and therefore, not as deserving as something like breast cancer. Afterall--the former happens to people for "personal decisions" I am told. Bad health decisions account for fewer cases of many diseases than we realize. Rationalizing why someone gets a particular illness may make other people feel good but it is just an illusion--a way of distancing one's self from the person with the disease. Ms. Seipp's description of the typical interaction with a disillusioned soul is accurate:

Cancer does have a couple of upsides. One is that you can put the fear of God into people with hardly any effort at all, and occasionally, I have to admit, I do this when they start waving their illusions around in front of me. “But…but…you never smoked? Not at all? So then…you lived with a smoker, right? You worked in a bar?” Etc. Mostly I just smile and answer the usual series of “no”s. But sometimes I say, “I know you’re looking for a reason why you’ll never get this, even though I did -- sorry, can’t help you.”

People want to believe that our motality is within our own hands--that somehow, if we are virtuous enough, disciplined enough or just plain relaxed enough, nothing bad will happen. But eventually reality wins out and we are left to cope with an illness in the best way we know how. I hope that I learn to cope as well as Ms. Seipp.